A year ago today I left Barnesville, Ohio. After five years at a really wonderful music camp that changed my life forever, I was stepping into the unknown life away from camp. I'm not saying this year hasn't been amazing, it's just been a year of change and new. It started changing the Monday after I returned. Either my friends here had changed or I had. Sadly it wasn't for the better. They did different things and "there wasn't enough room in the car" for me. It was difficult to get back into the community of school and my group of friends and I can't say that this summer has helped much either. A few weeks before school started things got a little bit better. Swim season started, I re-connected with friends, and people started wanting to hang out more. Once I got into the swing of senior year things improved a little more. I started hanging out with some of the same people and some "new" faces. Still a friend from seventh grade didn't know how to be with me. She had moved on. I hate remembering that part of this year. Then I realized that it shouldn't matter. Our plans to be best friends wasn't working out. I started realizing things were more fun without her sometimes and that I could make other friends.
All the while it was SO difficult to forget the summer; my last at FMC. It was different not applying to music camp in January, instead I was killing myself with auditions for school and dealing with college stuff. It was even more heartbreaking when I didn't get accepted to my dream school, Ithaca. I haven't told anyone about that audition, and I don't even care to. It was terrible. I don't think that I have EVER seen such pomp ass people in my life. So the year carried on.
Soon it started getting warm and the month of May happened and prom, NYSSMA, and senior trip zoomed by. June brought marching band, graduation, and work. July was ALL WORK, but all the while Ohio and FMC were in the back of my brain. Everyday I would go over what the FMCers where up to and remember times when I was there. August finally got here. It's ending now, and I know that soon there will be photos from the great summer everyone in Ohio has had. Don't get me wrong, I've LOVED my work and had a good summer, it's just been different.
Saturday I will travel to Ohio. I won't be going to good, old Barnesville, but the fact that I am going to be within driving distance is really tough. It kills me that I'll be so close and I won't even get to make a pen mark towards that wonderful place. Parts of me wish that I had gone this summer, but there will always be that understanding that I am growing up and I needed to get away. Life does go on and I will be in college soon. This isn't to say that I won't do everything in my power to become a counselor next year, because I plan to. I have loved this summer where I am now, but it's time to go back. Back where music is cherished and the summer is hot, back to the girls dorm lounge for collection; morning and evening. Away from reality and stress of life. It's time.
